To convey the essence of who we are, what we learned throughout our lives, and what make us unique, we need to share things we do not understand.
We may never understand, or even recognize, the key to our own essence and how to unlock what sets us apart.
What is difficult for us to share may contain the dilemmas we navigated that truly set us apart as individuals.
So, to get at the essential you, re-navigate the turbulent waters you have crossed.
How did you first notice you were different from other people? What were you doing?
For example, I remember finding out about about death. I have a few fleeting memories of my mother’s mother, my grandmother, Pearl Edith Palmer Osborn, Edith, before she passed away. She passed away July 20, 1960 according to official records. I remember going to pick cherries with her. Cherries ripen in June in Indiana.
I remember my father lifting me up to look at a body of lady in a box. She looked like no one I knew. I believe this was my first memory of a funeral home and that the person I did not recognize who was in a box was Grandma.
I remember Mom coming to tell me Grandma has died during the night, that Grandma was with Jesus. This made no sense to me. Meeting Jesus would be a happy event, but here Mom was, crying, and the most upset I had ever seen her. Something did not add up.
This is my first memory of experience with cognitive dissonance.
The second time I lost faith in what my parents told me was when I first went to school. The class was singing, “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” and the lyrics were different from what my father had taught me.
I became a skeptic quite early in life.
Twinkle twinkle little star
Up above the trolley car
If the train should jump the track.
Will I get my nickel back?
Donald Eugene Hill
These may seem like small things, but learning that there is a discontinuity between what you are taught and what you see, can be a huge assault on trust. That you are different than others in a way that can bring ridicule down upon you can be intimidating.
I recommend examining and possibly sharing things that caused, and perhaps still cause, discomfort.
Share how you came to be where you are. Do not just share the period at the end of the sentence, share the sentence.
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